Separation and divorce are some of the toughest experiences a person can face. They are a time of intense reactions and emotions, and both can lead people down a dark path. One of the best ways to cope with separation and divorce is to find support.
Support Helps You Process Emotions
Processing emotions after separation is an important first step in moving on and starting afresh if you need to. Emotionally focused therapies can help you to process the negative emotions surrounding separation.
Processing emotions in this way is not only important for learning how to deal with hurt and pain, but it is also an important part of realising the role you played in your separation. Self-reflection like this should come later to avoid blaming yourself for the separation, but it is still an important part of moving through various stages after separation.
Helping You Mourn the Loss
Marriage separation signifies the breaking down of a relationship that would have lasted years or even decades. Regardless of who initiated the divorce, there will be a lot of angst once the process is complete. Sadness, tears and grieving are part of the healing process. It is important to know that it is okay to feel angry and sad and that it is not okay to push these emotions down or ignore them.
Find support from friends and family who will help you mourn and process the loss without trying to fix things. Ask them if they will be there for you in case you need to talk or need someone to lean on. If they accept, you can be satisfied knowing you do not have to be alone through this process.
Helping Take Care of Yourself
The period after separation is a time of transition. You should expect some things to not be normal after the separation. It is okay and even expected to not function as you normally would at this time. Regardless, you need to take care of yourself and your family. You can reach out to the family law solicitors who helped you through your divorce to learn how to take care of your family. Once you know what is required of you, you can start taking care of yourself.
Find someone who will help you start nurturing yourself at this time. They can help you get back to doing the things you love or to even find ways to let out the negative emotions you feel. They will also help take care of appointments you need to keep and stop you from being too hard on yourself.
Finding Balance After Separation
The right friend or family member can also help you get some balance after the separation. It starts with helping you get into normal routines like eating, sleeping well and exercising. These routines are extremely important for helping you start getting your life on track, something many people say helps them through the most difficult phases of separation.
Your support will also help you find a balance between different activities and thinking through things. Remember that the period following separation is a time to reflect on what has happened and what needs to happen going forth. You should not dwell on the past, and this is why finding a balance between different activities and getting time to think is essential.
Support Stops Destructive Behaviours
Many people turn to destructive behaviours such as excessive drinking and smoking after separation. This is a coping and numbing mechanism that does not work, and you need someone to help stop you from doing this.
Support is extremely important after separation. It will help you work through the emotions you are feeling, come to terms with what has happened, and stop you going down a path you might not come back from.
